There it is - exhibit A.
Never has a single component given me so much trouble. I’d elected to walk away when the driver’s door on the Mini, complete with new skin, no longer fitted into the door shaped hole on the side of the car.
After a good few days cooling off, I went back and had another look. MoT certificates are a bit thin on the ground in the shed at the moment, and I had come to the conclusion that the man from the Ministry was not going to be presenting the Min with one if there was a chance the driver could fall out onto the road at any given point. Picky, but there you go.
I did the sensible thing. I put the kettle on. Then, I got the tape measure out and checked it all again. Strangely, the door hadn’t shrunk, nor had the door aperture grown. After thinking my way through at least half a dozen bodges to get the door to fit, I finally reached the only sensible solution. Cut the ‘new’ skin off and start again.
It was good excuse to nip over to MiniMail at Dymock to pick up a new skin and have a chat with Tim Harber. But gossiping was just an excuse for putting off the inevitable. I was determined that this time, I would measure, re-measure and then measure again, every step of the way.
The omens were good. The new skin was dimensionally identical to the original. It went onto the frame with little effort and little need for ‘manipulation.’ And shock horror, the finished door fitted.
On a roll, I decided to break out the spray gun and get some paint onto the door. The primer coats went on without a hitch, and after a quick de-nib and flat, I mixed up the top coat. It was going on like a dream, and no, not the sort of dream where you’re back at school and are stood in the playground without your trousers. Or your pants. This was a good one.
Going for gold, I mixed up the final coats, and sure enough, just as I was laying on the final coat, the gun decide now was the time to jettison some crap it had successfully been hiding deep in its unreachable bowels. One or two specks? No, enough to pretty much pock mark the whole width of the panel. Can a body panel be possessed?
As I looked up to the heavens and asked the question ‘Why?’, I realised this wouldn’t be the last time I’ll be in this situation. I know this, because I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve said, ‘Never again…’
I have had moments of clarity. I lived for a couple of years without a classic, the cars I owned went to the local garage or to a specialist when they needed work. My tools lay gathering dust in the corner of the shed, next to the lawnmower.
But working on cars and bikes is in the blood. There is nothing more satisfying than taking the rusty and the unloved, and turning it, if not into a thing of beauty, at least into something useful again. Learning new skills along the way, and being driven by nothing more than your own interest. So despite the setbacks, mistakes, total deadends and hopeless cases, you keep going back for more.
Ignoring my pockmarked door, knowing it would only be a matter of time before I set to with the wet and dry, I had a quick flick through my old photo albums and the evidence of my addiction was plain. For every picture of me driving one of my cars, there would be another of me lying underneath it, hoisting an engine into it, breaking out the welding gear to coax it through another MoT. And virtually every car I’ve owned is pictured in this way.
So I’ve come to the conclusion that for me, working on the cars holds as much pleasure as driving them, no matter how infuriating it can be at times. It forms a very valid part of the whole experience. And that’s why we’ve come up with Spanner Addicts. Embrace the addiction, and tell the world…
The Mini has been coming on in leaps and bounds. There’s just the driver’s door and the bonnet waiting to go on. Why no pictures? I just can’t bear to look at it at the moment, never mind take photos of it.
 |
 |
Above: A lot more hair and very fresh faced, but wearing the same old pained expression. You never learn...
Below: Another Mini, another engine swap. I did thousands of miles in that van, but spent just as much time working on it and keeping it on the road.
 |
GH's Pledge: "Measure twice, cut once. Stop cocking things up."
